Stoner dating tips

28-Dec-2017 19:48 by 8 Comments

Stoner dating tips - swedish dating los angeles

Maybe we’re keeping our brains neat because we love you.

I say “trying to read” because getting high and cracking open this Junot Diaz book has made me feel dumb, regret never learning Spanish, think “this book must have been hard to write,” fall asleep, and wake up to realize that I am so old that I now fall asleep while trying to read books.

One commenter blamed marijuana for her husband accusing her 11-year-old child of stealing from the supermarket. When the walls of a stoner's mind begin to look as if there were an interesting experimental film being projected onto them, staring into someone else’s face may become comparatively boring. Yet when your beau borrows the key and sticks it in the lock of your mind, the security alarm is activated. Perhaps there are lasers shooting across the floor. There will be times when, overbaked and sad, you will wish the person next to you would just win the entire Mortal Kombat tournament so that there would be nothing left to do but talk to you.

These board members shuffle along in a dystopian stoner fantasy of broken promises, a decidedly skunky smell steeped in the carpet, and a husband who showers, mouth hanging open, really really liking the shower so much so that he feels like he has never showered before in his life. Weed’s distractibility, its inappropriate amusement, and its dangling ends of elusive thoughts are dangerous sharp metal objects to introduce to your love life’s biodome, especially if your partner already gives you side-eye when he or she sees you flushing your bong with XXX Orange Poison. But that’s part of the sometimes frustrating work that goes into any relationship: There is a house to which only you have the right key.

” Weed is a padlock on a door we could otherwise secure with the metal chain of sarcastic commentary or the propped-up chair of passive-aggressive notes.

We sit in there, watching the visualizer morph, slowly considering the crap inside our heads until we get our brains neat.

But even if you're on-the-go or you don't live in a weed-legal state, you can still satisfy your curiosity from your phone.

And we're not just talking about the massive collections of Rasta-themed i Phone backgrounds, here.

I asked myself this the other day as I sat alone outside, checking my email over and over while smoking a joint.

It was daytime, but it was Saturday, so I wasn’t being irresponsibly chill.

In these disorganized storage facilities of our relationships, the discovery of a forgotten dime bag is rarely a pleasant surprise. “I just want to watch in a state where maybe I can enjoy it.” But when you decide upon the person with whom you will share your couch, you will be forever reminded that weed is much more than just a 23-minute weekly escape. ” And your boyfriend or girlfriend or wife or husband flees the house and gets in the car; they throw the key at you and say, “What the hell were you talking about? When potheads fall in love, you’d think that they’d both be comfortable cohabitating in this shared vacation house of the mind.

Just try following the rabbit hole of message boards relating to the topic “I’m dating a stoner.” The body of the message is hardly ever, “Lucky me.” More often, the message is an incredibly detailed account of husbands coughing so loud that it wakes the neighbors, wives who stare into—instead of at—the television screen, boyfriends who hand you emergency grocery lists consisting only of Nutella and honey roasted peanuts, and girlfriends who are made so insecure by their THC-inspired paranoia that they will not allow you to stare at them naked in the way that you would like (probingly, like sober people do). It is an entire vacation house with a sick kitchen and a magical fridge stocked with endless amounts of fascinating Wikipedia articles and documentaries from 1985. But the fact that pot is still lowering its body, millimeters at a time, into the chilly swimming pool of legality means that each person’s personal acceptance of marijuana use is fluid and subject to reconsideration.

Instead, we’ll take long-time smokers and total newbies through the various complexities of the current cannabis world.